Curious coconuts and crazy cockroaches

WE HAVE A HOME!!!  The road to getting where we are today is a bit on the rocky side of things, BUT after due diligence and lots of frustration, we have rented an apartment for the year and it feels darn good :)  Although I hate to leave the nest at Belén’s, it is time for me to spread my wings and get a goin’ to where I gots to be getting.

Belén has cooked me many meals and we have finished even more bottles of wine and beer with Miguel and it’s been a fabulous time.  Let me share with you the details of the past week’s events:

School started up with a nice kick in the pants.  Students don’t realize this, but teachers want to be in classes just as much as the kids do.  So, at the beginning of the year you can imagine the ambience at this place.  But, after a week of school already in session, I received my time table of classes and was all legit to go.  Belén made pizza for dinner one night and after we had some fruit for dessert.  I was offered a coco and refused (trust me, when you are in a different country and you are offered a food that you don’t understand the name of, ALWAYS REFUSE!!  Never know if you are going to luck out with something totally rad or a bowl full of monkey brains) but I’m soooo glad Irea, the youngest of Belén’s daughters, did not.  I was thinking it was something chocolate-ish and being a hater of most sweets I really thought I was being clever by connecting coco to cocoa.  But alas, Miguel went to the fridge and pulled out this coco.  And it was a coconut.  Another bad guess by the Brennster.  Anyway, it wasn’t like shredded coconut, it was a whole hairy round coconut.  I may be a little sheltered but never in my day have I seen such a thing uncut and uncleaned.  For these reasons I was incredibly curious to see how you do in fact open a coconut.  I have no idea where to even begin to open a coconut.  Well it wasn’t long after I was watching that I realized that Miguel didn’t have the slightest clue either.  Awesome.  First he tried to stab it with a knife.  NOPE.  The he tried to use a wine bottle opener.  Strike 2.  Finally he left the kitchen and returned with a pick and hammer.  Ding ding ding, we have a winner.  He managed to pike 2 small holes in the top of the coconut and drain the juice.  To my surprise that coconut was packin quite a bit of juice.  Like a whole stinkin pint.  (and here’s a little tip for all those who have not yet drank from a freshly stabbed coconut: the juice=not good.  Bad actually, very very bad.)  So great, he drained the coconut and now he just needed to get up in there and take out all the fresh white meat.  He swings open the window and give the beast fruit a solid whack.  nothing.  cracks it again.  nothing.  One last violent blow and *poof* the difficult little round fruit opens up like a clam and reveals its inner goodness.  Irea ate a bite and was less than impressed with it, the look on Miguel’s face was priceless.  Hurt even.  All the hard work, creativity, and sweat on his brow for a less than enthusiastic response.  I tried some fresh coco myself and I have to tell ya...tastes just like sunscreen smells.  

Okay so after a week of searching, turn downs, and cramping a friend’s style in her house, we finally found an apartment that we could move into immediately.  It is in the exact same neighborhood as our place last year and it appeared to be pretty great.  We are only renting the rooms so although we have access to the whole place, there are 3 rooms and we don’t have a say in the other roommate because the landlords rent that out on a first come first served basis.  Bueno.  We paid the first month’s rent and a one month deposit and were ready to move in.  Belén and Miguel packed all my things into there VW and drove me over.  After we moved everything in, they left and Callie and I were happy to finally be able to relax.  After a few hours we decided to make our first meal in our new apartment.  We got groceries, ran home and headed for the kitchen.  We flipped on the lights and the counters, sink, and cabinets started moving.  Scurrying really.  It went from brown to white and blue.  If you have not yet guessed, we were NOT on LSD...we had cockroaches.  Not a cockroach or a small peaceful family, but muchas muchas muchas cucarachas.  FFFFUUUUUUUUUUUDDDDDDGGGGEEEEE (just like in “A Christmas Story”, I’m editing the four letter word that creeped out of my mouth.  It felt like slow-mo just the same).  Well this is great.  We just gave some old spanish man that we just met all of our money, didn’t sign a contract, and now have an infestation of critters.  Perfecto.  Well I’ll spare the horrifying details, but we got in contact with our landlord who immediately called the pest control service.  We fumigated the apartment on Friday and slept there Friday night.  Good idea? you decide.  We could use everything but the kitchen so we found some great cheap street food for the weekend and on Monday a cleaning lady came and swept up all of the cockroach bodies and made our place sparkle like new (and it was probably new in about 1930 so considering everything, it doesn’t look half bad at all).  Callie and I are finally all settled in, were told we have a male roommate from the canary islands who doesn’t speak a word of english and will move in at the end of this week.  Clearly, updates to follow.  But as for now we are incredibly happy with our place and have decided that we have lucked out for now.  Holy crap i don’t want to move again and go thru this stuff all over!!!

On a complete side note, I’m writing this in the teachers’ room at my school during my break and I’m sitting in a chair that just so happens to be between the other two teachers in the room.  They are both about 2 feet away from me on either side and they are yelling at each other.   Loudly.  I’m not sure where to look.  AWKWARRRRD.

Homeless aint so bad, i got peeps :)

I know you are thinking to yourself “Homeless?  Surely she’s mistaken.”  Let me put your questions to rest---> I am indeed in the center of madrid in the land of petty thieves and funny languages without a place to hang my hat at the end of the day.  I’ve been here for 5 days and I’m finding it just short of impossible to find an apartment to rent under my working conditions.  You need to have the following prerequisites in order to sign an apartment contract here: be a legal resident (check), have a working contract with a business in Spain (check), have a bank account that has money coming in due to said job (check), and be here for at least one year (check).  So why is this proving to be so stinkin’ difficult?? Because the company that employs me is absolutely impossible and refuses to give me the correct documentation so that I can prove that I qualify for all of these things.  Do I have a contract? yes.  Do I have access to it? no.  They sign the contract and then email it to me.  There is nowhere for me to sign it and in turn the emailed copy is void.  Am I a legal resident? yes.  Do I have a valid card to prove it? no.    My NIE (residence card) is expired and although I have an appointment with the government to get a new one which is all I need for the customs officers and the police officers but not enough to get a place to live.  Have I got a bank account? yes.  Have I been paid in 3 months?  no.  Because I am a teacher I only get paid October thru June and they need to see that I have had money coming in for the last three months (July, August, and September).  Enough to pull your hair out, isn’t it?!?!  Oh Spain, all I do is love you and all you do is poo on me.  WHAT. IS. THE. DEEEAAALLLL?!?!?  I really need to get out of these types of relationships, yaknowwhati’msayin??

However, there is a beautiful silver lining on this one hell of a dark cloud.  My spanish family.  Belén and Miguel and the girls have graciously opened their house (and their refrigerator) to me once again.  I have been staying with them since I arrived and I gotta tell ya’ll: This homeless life really isn’t that bad :)  I have my own bedroom outfitted with a great bed and cool air because it’s in the basement (invaluable in this crazy spanish heat).  I even have my own bathroom with a shower in it.  Not bad, not bad at all.  I know this sounds great and all and you’re all wondering why the heck I’m looking for a new place to live and to be honest the idea of staying in the lap of luxury isn’t a bad one.  But alas, I am an adult and and they are a family and although my time there is great, all good things must come to an end.  It’s like having a slumber party over and over again.  Sooner or later they’re going to get sick of me and I’d really like to leave before we get to that point!

So, in order to find an apartment you have the option of searching a few different ways here.  First, you can look online at the endless apartment websites that either lead you to dead ends or creepy roommates (seriously, I wont bore you with the details but I will say that last night an ad took us to a great area of town, great building, and a sir creepsalot by the name of Mili).  Second, you can walk around the city with your neck strained to look at all the tall buildings because they hang their “for rent” signs off their balconies.  I wish there was a map of the city with my footprints showing all the places we have walked.  We have walked from Legazpi to Tetuán (that’s like 7 miles) and everywhere in between, and Callie has called literally about 75 people inquiring about apartments and so far all the leads we have are just not making the cut.  And if they do we don’t even qualify for the places.  I’m over here walking my ass off (like that’s even possible) and all signs point to---> LOSER.  Nothing.  Nada.  Ladies and gentlemen, check back with me in about 2 months but at the moment, this stinks!  Although this is rather upsetting, i refuse to be discouraged!! I WILL find a place to live.  It WILL be nice.  And I’ll post pictures of the beauty as soon as I’ve won it over :)  It’s been 5 days and I don’t already have everything that I want with all my things falling into place, what is this world coming to??  

Welcome back!...now hit the bricks!

So I’ve left the nest many times in my day.  I left for college when I was only 17 to go to Pittsburgh, I left for Ireland when I was 20, and went for my first round in Madrid when I was 22.  So why then, do I find myself emotional when leaving this time?  I didn’t even know that was possible.  I’ve already been thru this and while I was enjoying my last night at home with my dogs and not packing, I hugged both their necks as hard as I could and when I tried to speak to tell them to be good for Mom and Dad while I was gone, I realized that there was a frog the size of a bowling ball in my throat prohibiting me from speaking.  I got really hot, had trouble breathing, and I could feel my face turn red as my eyes filled up with a watery sting.  What the heck was happening??  I’ve heard of this before, I believe it’s called sadness and I never thought I’d be a victim of this debilitating state.  But, I suppose we all have to go thru it.  I found myself violently bawling in the fur of two very confused labs.  Both my puppies,  Marley and Murphy, are basically the same size as me and although SOME people think they are no more than animals dependent on humans for survival, they’re much more.  They are the creators of happiness, a soft pillow on the floor when I’m watching TV, and the only souls in this world that I can trust with every secret I have ever had.  They are part of our family and we treat them as such.  And when I was spending my last hours with them all I could think about was not being able to run my fingers thru their hair for the next ten months.  I miss my family so much, but they can talk to me on the phone and on skype.  When my parents put the dogs on skype, they just think it’s like the TV and look aimlessly at it.  When they hear my voice they automatically look up at my room, sometimes run up there to see if I’m there, and then that’s it.  They don’t see me on the computer.  Heartbreaking, really.  And so I sat there, like a 5 year old crying.  

The morning that I left I went and got breakfast with my Auntie Joyce and Uncle Bill at steak & shake.  Seriously, their breakfast is pretty good.  Who woulda thought??  They brought me a book and a really sweet card and I found that darn frog resting comfortably snug in my throat once again.  I was holding it in pretty good when I was hugging them good bye but inevitably later when I was reading the card that I couldn’t finish at the burger joint, the tears started rolling.

When we finally rushed out of the house with my poorly packed goods for my 3:00 flight, I was completely frazzled.  I waited to pack my bags the morning I left which in hindsight wasn’t the best of ideas.  So we finally were off to the airport and about 15 minutes into the 30 minute ride I realized that I had left my spanish cell phone at home.  While a mobile phone sounds rather insignificant in the big scheme of things, when you are traveling to a different continent and have no place to live, getting in touch with your friends is the most important thing and that cell phone is like my lifeline.  We didn’t have much time so I called Sean (another source of my tears.  I gave Kyle a hug the night before who also made the frog return. I’m turning into a blubbering baby these days, I’ll tell ya!) to have him meet me at the airport with it.  We got to the airport at about 1:45 and when we finally got our heavy bags checked it was around 2:00.  Perfect, we still had about 40 minutes to hang out with my mom and dad before we had to go thru security so dad was outside at the curb waiting for sean and my mom and I made our way to wendy’s for my LAST frosty in a long long time.  I checked the boards to make sure that my flight was on time and it was.  But the funny thing was: the flight said it was leaving on time...at 2:19.  Weird, why would it say that our flight was on time at 2:19 when it wasn’t leaving until 3:00??  Oohh, riiight, I read the itinerary wrong (i swear that has never happened before!) and I now had 19 minutes to get my phone, get thru security, and catch my flight.  Dad was still waiting outside and I talked with the security who said that they could let me thru and then send my phone thru when it came to meet me at the gate.  Perfect except I didn’t say good bye to my pops yet.  AAAAHHHHHH.  Panic ensued as my mom starts to hug me with her quick good byes trying to push me to security.  I held my ground and at 2:07 (i checked the time every 5 seconds) I saw my dad running towards me with my bright orage covered phone in his hand.  He shoved it in my bags, gave me a kiss and a squeeze and I ran thru the security line, got thru and made it to my gate at exactly 2:09.  10 minutes before the flight takes off, JUST IN THE NICK OF TIME!!  and everybody on my flight was still there waiting.  No one had boarded yet.  How thoughtful waiting for me, right?? SIKE.  They were all waiting because the flight coming in was delayed, in turn delaying mine.  So I still got there with about 40 minutes before we boarded.  AAAHHHHH again.  I rushed for nothing? No wendys???  Son of a...!!!

After my layover in Atlanta I made it to Madrid with a warm welcome from a family of one of my students who picked me up and dropped me off at Beléns (seriously, it’s good to make the right friends, huh?).  I got to her house jet lagged and tired and ready for a nap.  Cecilia, Belén’s daughter, helped me with my smaller bags down to the basement where my room is.  You have to go down a set of winding brick stairs to get there and while a coherent, sober adult would have no problems getting down the stairs in one piece, of course I would have difficulties.  I grabbed my huge bag and started to walk down the stairs and about two steps in completely ate it and fell plunging head first over my bags and down the brick stairs.  Welcome back, Brenna!!  

So what have we learned??  Pack before the morning you leave, check and recheck your flight times, I’m a REALLY ugly cryer, and under no circumstances is it okay to lug a bag bigger than yourself down winding brick stairs.  EVER.  It’s going to be a good year guys, there is no reason for it not to be :):)